Friday The 13th Blog

This one comes from staffer Brad at my home away from here, Benevolent Street. Brad was one of those lucky enough to have managed to track down an advanced screening of the film. This one is spoiler free. Enjoy.

Greetings my fellow Friday fanatics! By a chance of complete luck, I was able to get into an advanced screening of Platinum Dunes newest installment of the Friday the 13th series last night. With a theater packed to the gills with police, critics, and people who seemed like “I’m only here because I have to be”, it turned out to be quite the entertaining night. The theater was electric in their anticipation of our favorite hockey masked killer.

Not to mention that lovable bunch over at the MPAA who promised strong graphic violence, strong sexual content, drug use, and language. Sound like a winning recipe for an adventure with Mr. Voorhees? Is the newest reboot in the franchise 90 minutes of pure terror or pure boredom?

Come with me on a journey to Crystal Lake my Benevolent brethren and read about the madness with your own eyes. I can’t promise your safety, but it’ll be completely spoiler free!

The synopsis is as follows:

Against the advice of police and locals, Clay Miller heads up to the eerie woods of Crystal Lake in search of his sister who went missing six weeks prior. With the help of a group of college kids who party up the weekend on the Lake, Clay begins his search. However, when they stumble upon the creaky remains of old rotting cabins, they find themselves in for more than they bargained for.

First of all, what don’t these kids get? When Jason says “no trespassing” he means it! That means no building a house on his territory, no rummaging through his belongings, and no swimming on his lake! Technically, it comes to a point where a court of law would have to rule in favor of him would they not?

The movie features an absurd amount of breasts, a respectable body count, a surprising amount of humor, and a completely new definition of Jason. Depending on the viewer’s taste in old man Voorhees, this will be a breath of fresh air or a complete departure from everything we knew about the character. Those who look for a slightly retarded Jason will be disappointed. Trust me when I say that he’s fully aware and functioning. And man does he have a mean streak! Voorhees is a man who grew up in the woods, so he uses these surroundings to his advantage to outsmart the city slickers who have no idea what they’ve gotten themselves into. Don’t worry about Derek Mears, he does a fine job creating this entirely new vision of Jason Voorhees.

One of the greatest parts of the new Friday is the ability to have all the genre conventions that the series is known for, but to also spit in the face of a lot of them as well. When we assume that somethings coming, we’re probably right, but not in the way we’re expecting. Of course there are cliches, because what would the genre be without them? The Friday the 13th movies have been praised as “set ‘em up and knock ‘em down” horror movies, which is exactly what we the fans are asking for.

Now, I don’t watch a lot of television so I couldn’t tell you anything about what the actors have been in, but they’re a completely faceless bunch to me. Why is this important? Well, this sets up the “anyone can get it” factor. When you cast relatively big name stars in horror movies, it’s an almost assurance that they’ll survive by the time the credits roll. However, when you don’t recognize anyone, it’s safe to assume that they have a date with death very soon.

Should you go see it? Does Jason kill in the woods and clean up the blood with a furry white rabbit? Don’t go in expecting to be blown away, because surely disappointment will follow. That being said, any fan of the Friday the 13th franchise owes it to themselves and the fanbase to support this new film and hopefully get us a sequel! If the Saw movies can have an annual bloodbath, then Jason is certainly qualified for the same treatment. Grab your significant other and drag them to a showing on Friday the 13th! Can’t make it? Then drag ‘em on Valentines day! Who better to spend your evening with than Jason?

Just remember to stay out of the woods!

ki ki ki ma ma ma…