HorrorMovies.Ca Review Friday The 13th

Posted 11 Feb 2009 in New Fridays

New review in, read it below. It’s negative, but from reading it the reviewer seems like a real wuss. Even someone that hates a movie should at least be able to write a review that isn’t this boring. “The movie wouldn’t let me” – oh, spare me the melodrama.

It is one of the movies that always got me so excited I couldn’t wait to get inside the theater to see it. Most of the time after leaving, I couldn’t wait to get back in and see it again. The Friday the 13th series has always been a bright spot for me. Even the bad ones felt like they had potential on the way in. So why could I not feel the same way about this one? I did my best to not look at it as a remake and just enjoy it as maybe another version of Friday the 13th. The only problem with that is the movie wouldn’t let me.

By now, most of us probably already know there are aspects of the first few movies in this film. I mean you have to introduce the mom, show him with the sack, and then throw in the hockey mask. So that does put us well into the third film. There is also the storyline of a brother looking for his sister and that was actually something in the 4th installment of the originals. So how do you put four good movies together and make them work in one film? I wish I had the answer, but this is how the “fine” folks at Platinum Dunes decided to go about it.

The movie starts on Friday the 13th in 1980 with a younger woman running through the woods on a stormy night. She stops along the edge of a lake and then we see and hear (unfortunately) another woman telling her how she has killed all the others and she is the last one. As she goes to make her move, the young woman lops off the head with a machete. Hope I didn’t ruin anything for anyone with that shocker. We then see a small thin set of legs show up next to the beheaded body. A childlike hand then reaches out on the ground and pulls up a locket that must’ve belonged to the deceased. In it is a picture of the head and a small boy.

Present day comes along and we see a group of young adults making their way through the woods. We then discover that they are in search of a relaxing outing with great rewards. Apparently there is a marijuana field somewhere in this area that they plan on turning into a small fortune. They get a little turned around and decide to camp for the night and look for the pot later. There are two couples and the geek at this little event. Night comes and they sit around a small campfire as the geek goes on about a story of a woman who went crazy and killed a bunch of counselors somewhere in this area. Then he continues to tell the story of how the son, Jason, actually came back after seeing his mother beheaded. After he tells the story one of the couples decides to make their way out into the wilderness for a nighttime hike. The other three campers stay at camp, but shortly after it is brought to the attention of the nerd that it would be better if he went elsewhere. He takes off with his iPod and as he is relieving himself in the woods, he comes across their little treasure crop. While he is inspecting the plants, he realizes first hand that Jason isn’t a legend.

We then see the two hikers have made their way to Camp Crystal Lake. They are looking through the cabins and come across a small bed with “Jason” engraved in the headboard. We then flashback to our other couple getting really busy, but they are then disturbed by the noise of rustling outside the tent. The brave man ventures out to make sure it isn’t the nerd spying on them and stumbles across the marijuana and then what is left of his friend. He tries to make it back to the camp in time, but is caught in a bear trap just along the edge of the clearing. He does see that his girlfriend has had a a run in with Jason though. We then flash back to the camp where now the two hikers have investigated enough and find a locket. The guy jokes how the girl looks like the woman in the jewelry and tells her to hang onto it. He continues his search and calls her to come in and see something in the bathroom. There is a hole in the wall and he thinks there is some sort of doll’s head inside. He reaches in and…well it isn’t a doll’s head. Suddenly the door of the cabin slams shut and a machete starts poking up through the floor. I’ll jump a little more ahead now.

Six weeks later finds us following another group of kids into the same area. They stop to get gas and run into Clay (Jared Padalecki), who is handing out flyers in hopes of finding his missing sister Whitney (Amanda Righetti). Seeing the flyer we realize this is the same person who had taken the locket earlier. The young jock Trent (Travis Van Winkle), rudely asks Clay to move along because they have places they need to be. There is a small confrontation, but Jenna (Danielle Panabaker), who is Trent’s girlfriend, intervenes. Trent and the gang head off in their SUV and Clay hit’s the dusty trail on his motorcycle in search of his sister. Of course the cabin the group is going to is located along the side of Crystal Lake and it is also the same area in which Clay continues his search. Clay ends up running across Jenna at the house and is treated rudely again by Trent. This causes Jenna to help Clay as he searches for his sister. There is one problem with that and that is they are on Crystal Lake and Jason is still out there.

The acting was pretty weak. I despised the opening scene. If you can’t at least come a little closer to the basis of this whole stupid remake then do it another way. Not that the series is known for it’s great writing and acting, but the way this was diced up would’ve actually made the Jason I grew up with proud. Padalecki and Panabaker weren’t bad and I did like seeing the familiar face of Travis Davis, but that really wasn’t enough.

So onto what the series is known for, the kills. They didn’t skimp on them, but some of them lacked the creativity that I always liked in the movies. I’m not saying they were all just small cuts and beheadings, but they just seemed to miss this obvious way to keep me interested. I did enjoy a sleeping bag scene, but not as well as THE sleeping bag scene. Plenty of blood and impalements, but nothing too out of the box.

In the end it is really hard for me to like this movie. I mean it was hard for me to work up the nerve to just put aside my biases and sit through the movie and try to enjoy it, but when I don’t care about Jason in a Friday the 13th movie, something is seriously wrong. This Jason was not the Jason I grew up with and this was far from the Crystal Lake I dreamed of one day finding. There were moments were it seemed like I was getting cliff notes of the originals, a red barn here, a guy telling the Jason legend there, even an arrow scene right after finding the hockey mask (another poor excuse for creativity), plenty of examples of how sex only leads to death, but that wasn’t enough for me to want to forgive this movie for ever being made. Is it a good horror movie? It is decent. Is it a good retelling of my favorite series? Not even close.

Source: Horror-Movies.ca

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31 Comments

  1. SubNoiZe (11 Feb 2009, 5:22)

    I caught a screening last night in Charlotte, NC and this guy must clearly isn’t a F13 fan. I grew up watching Jason. My parents took me to see part 3(3D) when I was 8 years old. I had extremely high expectations for this movie, and I was NOT let down. I can’t wait to see it again this Friday night.

    With all the great reviews I have been reading online, why was this one selected and posted here? The author of this review seems that he would have enjoyed Hotel For Dogs much better…

  2. Kevin (11 Feb 2009, 5:37)

    Bad reviews and Friday the 13th movies go hand in hand. I’m still not worried.

  3. afwickster (11 Feb 2009, 5:44)

    Yeah, don\’t this review even went into it like he said. He sounds just like any anti horror review. Being delpoyed, 95% of the people I know back stateside, said they loved it. Yes it has it faults, but it is an improvement over part 8 to FvJ.

  4. Lolwut (11 Feb 2009, 6:43)

    You should realize that this is only a reader review. Not the review from the website so the headline is wrong. horrormovies.ca did not review Friday The 13th. One of the site’s users did. And there is no way to know if he really saw it or not. From what I read of his review, it’s more of a rant against remakes than anything of substance.

  5. Brenton (11 Feb 2009, 7:29)

    “not the Jason I grew up with”? hmm… seems like another person who never watched and of the earlier, pre-zombie Jason films of the series… he ran, he planned, he set traps! Get over it dude!

  6. Dusk (11 Feb 2009, 8:16)

    You should realize that this is only a reader review. Not the review from the website so the headline is wrong. horrormovies.ca did not review Friday The 13th. One of the site’s users did.

    Hi lolwut thanks for posting. Horrormovies.ca posted it from one of their readers, true, but the site promoted it as the “first review” of the film. As such, they call claim to it. They also posted it in their horror reviews section which doesn’t specify difference between staff and fan reviews (and if they do, I couldn’t tell among their mangled and claustrophobic design).

    “With all the great reviews I have been reading online, why was this one selected and posted here?”

    Hi subnoize, great question. I’ve yet to stumble on any other reviews besides this and the AICN one. I’m sure many, many are out there but I do what I can with my limited time and also rely on you guys for intel. I also thought the fact that I disliked the review wasn’t a good enough reason to hold it from you guys. I wasn’t expecting everyone to agree with me (lol).

  7. Dean Of The Dead (11 Feb 2009, 8:21)

    Most of the reviews I’ve read (and yes..I am remaining spoiler free if it kills me) have been positive. Everyone has their own opinion. I respect that. but negative reviews of this movie will be looked at with disdain in my eyes. Fuck you, haters, lol ;)

  8. jay1 (11 Feb 2009, 8:46)

    I just came from a screening and I thought it was a lot of fun. I’m a fan, I’m actually watching the original on fearnet right now as i type this. anyone interested can check out my review at fishandspaghetti.com peace.

  9. JasonFan1983 (11 Feb 2009, 9:59)

    FRIDAY THE 13TH and bad reviews do indeed seemed to be joined at the hip.

    People will still see this film…nothing will stop that!!!

  10. francesco (11 Feb 2009, 10:48)

    i’ve never read good reviews about f13th franchise, so i’m not worried. this time is different for the very first time i’ve read goo reviews too. i just hope people will love this movie….as it was for fvj that made 82 millions.

  11. Matt the 13th (11 Feb 2009, 11:41)

    I always love hearing about and reading reviews on movies I am looking forward to see… I amhowever avoiding these ones because the whole opening sequence is now spoiled for me! even though I would have guessed an opening similar to those lines. I have never been this excited for a film, Friday the 13th is my all time favourite series, and lilms of all time. I am 25 and the only movie I was old enough to go see in theatres by myself mas jason x haha, although I seen all the drive in marathons so I still know and love the big screen effect jason voorhees has on me.

    DAY AFTER TOMORROW!
    Ki ki Ma ma!
    the big man returns

  12. Savini (11 Feb 2009, 13:22)

    I don’t care about the reviews. It’s fun reading them but it’s Friday the 13th so I’m not surprised. Bad reviews can’t spoil my Friday the 13th. I’m going to enjoy the movie and see for my self….I will probably love it anyway.

    If you live in Sweden as I do…go see it and make it number one on the swedish boxoffice charts.

  13. JASON_GOALIE_67 (11 Feb 2009, 13:25)

    AMEN Matt the 13th, this movie was NEVER made for the critics but for us. It’s our money and our choice to see the movie and i’m sure all our minds were made up to see it as soon as production started. Personally, i think most reviewers are jealous that they can’t let their hair down and just enjoy Jason!

  14. James Smith (11 Feb 2009, 13:44)

    The reviewers are uptight pricks! :-)

  15. shotz10 (11 Feb 2009, 14:13)

    i dont care what they say !! me and 8 of my friends are going i sat through jason x and said it was ok this should blow the doors off jason x !!! i have not even seen this and cant weight for a part 2 lol jumping the gun a bit but whatever i should be #1 in the box offic there is no movie out this week to even touch this id say 35 mill…..first week maby 55….

  16. Jason (11 Feb 2009, 15:09)

    Saw it last night at a sneak preview. I know you guys don’t want to hear this, but it sucked. Save your $9-$10 for something else. I’m a long-time F13 fan and this new movie was an insult to the fans and the series. Dumb, dumb and dumb! I can’t believe it took 3(!) guys to write that piece of shit.

  17. Christian Sellers (11 Feb 2009, 15:21)

    Every Friday movie since part one has been slated by the media. Fuck ‘em!

  18. T (11 Feb 2009, 16:40)

    jason can you tell me why it suck and how did he get the mask

  19. jasonx316 (11 Feb 2009, 18:11)

    Unfortunately i saw it to last night at amc lynnhaven 18 in virginia beach, va. I am too a die hard fan of the series. And i have to say honestly that this reviewer is dead on with his description. The movie was not bad but it was not great either. The kills seemed a little toned down and it was not as brutal as a Jason movie should be, But i will say Derek Mears did a great job, but there is only one Kane Hodder. I really want to see it again because the first time was more of a(wow, i can’t believe im finally seeing this) but after it had ended, i was surprised that i felt so let down. Hopefully it was just me, and everybody will love it and think its great, but it just seems like ever since New Line has taken over Jason, something just seems to be missing….

  20. jmuller (11 Feb 2009, 18:19)

    I SAW A ADVANCE SCREENING OF IT AND I REALLY ENJOYED IT…

    ITS A GOOD SLASHER FILM…

    8 OUT OF 10 I GIVE IT

  21. F13 FanAtic (11 Feb 2009, 18:39)

    jasonx316, we did get that trusty ol’ Paramount logo for the first time since Part VIII, though! I understand your disappointment because I felt a little let down as well, but I’m sure you also went in with ridiculous expectations. Us die-hards have been waiting for Jason to return to Crystal Lake for a long, long time so our anticipation might have ruined the film for us. I’m giving it another shot now that I know what is missing and lacking so I can enjoy what was included and not focus on (Oh, I hope this happens or this happens) expectations.

  22. jasonx316 (11 Feb 2009, 19:00)

    F13 Fanatic i agree with you absolutely. I liked the movie, and i thought it was decent, I was just expecting more. I don\\\\\\\’t know why i was expecting more but i was. But all in all, it was def not a bad movie, there were some things that bothered me, and i wont give anything away but im sure you know what im talking about. The paramount logo was definitely a nice thing to see though, but it just feels like something is missing. Maybe it\\\\\\\’s Kane, maybe it\\\\\\\’s not. I even liked Jason X, but now that time has passed I really don\\\\\\\’t like Freddy vs Jason anymore, except for the fighting scene(which was classic) but the rest of the movie was kinda bland. I can definitely see some of the resemblances between Freddy Vs. and this new movie. I know it was the same writers(Damian Shannon and Mark Swift) plus another guy, but even some of the lines used were right outta Freddy vs. Well sorry to ramble for so long, but I really want to talk about this new movie and there is no one here who has seen it yet, well i hope all of you enjoy the movie, and i will def be back at the midnight showing for round 2, hopefully it will sit better with me than the first viewing

  23. Boogeyman78 (11 Feb 2009, 21:18)

    Well, as excited as I was to see this just as all of you are, the remake of Friday the 13th fell short of all expectations I had and I was VERY dissapointed. The storyline and how they decided to go about the re-telling was weak, the characters were weak; I found it very tough to sit thru the movie. I’m not going to speak on specifics in any attempts to ruin anything for everyone else, but I forsee and very negative response from the diehard Friday fanbase come the weekend… I went online when I got home last night and read the reviews I could find and I found them to be pretty dead on. I’m talking about reviews from people who know their Friday the 13th movies and are fans of the series, not reviewers who do nothing but bash the slasher movies in general because that’s expected and I could care less. But to hear most of them say the same thing, and having me agree with them, it’s just dissapointing and I find it tough to see anything good come out of this, unfortunately… :(

  24. voorhees13 (11 Feb 2009, 21:19)

    u will never catch me worried…..this movie sounds kill. This guy is clearly not a friday fan and probably not a horror movie fan….what a wuss!

  25. cinemartin (12 Feb 2009, 0:06)

    Why does it sound like that? The guy clearly has at least some knowledge of the series as he references key plot points from the first 4 films. This is supposed to be a Friday The 13th forum, where discussions can be had about these films – a guy posts a negative review of this movie and everyone who hasn’t seen it yet attacks him? This is a Platinum Dunes remake of Friday The 13th! Anyone who is not worried by that prospect isn’t a real Friday fan.

  26. roy burns (12 Feb 2009, 0:24)

    how can you say its not as brutal as a friday film should be?! its JUST as brutal as one should be. the kills were the best part of the movie besides derek mears, who is THE fucking best jason since ted white

  27. no hair (12 Feb 2009, 5:44)

    AS LONG AS JASON AINT IN NEW YORK AINT BODY HOPPING AINT IN SPACE AINT THE GOOD GUY IN A FREDDY NIGHTMARE AND IS BACK AT CAMP CRYSTAL LAKE I CANT COMPLAIN I STILL WISH HE DIDNT HAVE HAIR BUT ILL TAKE IT OVER ANY NEW LINE HAS DONE IN RECENT YEARS IT TOOK PARAMOUNT TO COME BACK TO GET SERIOUS AGAIN

  28. Lance (12 Feb 2009, 8:04)

    “AS LONG AS JASON AINT IN NEW YORK AINT BODY HOPPING AINT IN SPACE AINT THE GOOD GUY IN A FREDDY NIGHTMARE AND IS BACK AT CAMP CRYSTAL LAKE I CANT COMPLAIN”

    Amen. I am with you.

  29. Lance (12 Feb 2009, 8:13)

    To all the fans of the series. I was just reading over some of the reviews posted for the remake at rotten tomatoes. Interestingly, a couple of the reviewers who hated this remake also hate the original film. So my question is: Why the hell did they see the remake when they hate the series in the first place? As far as I am concerned, the series is critic proof.

  30. Jason (12 Feb 2009, 15:31)

    “jason can you tell me why it suck and how did he get the mask”

    I could go on for hours as to why it sucked. It seems a lot of guys on here (and other boards) don’t want to hear that this movie is horrible; that New Line/Platinum Dunes has ruin this franchise. But it’s true. Any fan of the original series will reject this movie. I’m a huge F13 fan and I honestly wanted this movie to be good. But let’s just say that if you consider yourself an intelligent person then you will be insulted by how unbelievably stupid this movie is. Yes, horror characters are supposed to be stupid, but theses people are dumber than dumb. They make Junior from Part V look like a genius. It’s dumb, the cheap attempts at humor are un-funny, the kills are tame and lame, it lacks any kind of suspense, and it’s a waste of your time and money.

    I’m not going to give away how Jason gets the mask because people will be pissed, but I will say that particular scene is underwhelming. He might as well have come out of the barn wearing the mask like in Part 3 because that’s all it amounts to IMO.

  31. Boogeyman78 (12 Feb 2009, 19:51)

    Jason, you said it all. I’m a huge fan of the series as well, but I felt nothing but dissapointment when I came out of the screening. This movie lacks, and it lacks big time. You’ll get those people who like it and those who don’t, but the majority of the diehard fanbase are gonna’ be let down. Honestly, it didn’t feel much like a Friday the 13th movie to me. Sure Jason is in it and he does his thing, but it lacks a storyline, the music is nowhere to be found, and the characters suck. To me, without a good storyline, you have nothing, and that’s just what this movie is unfortunately.



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